We've had many Game Boy Pockets, GBA SPs and other portable devices snatched up by certain agitated educators during our formative years, which is why the recent news of a new program to teach English to Japanese students using the Nintendo DS fills us with unbridled, elderly bitterness. Think of the things our generation of handheld companions could have taught us! Geometry from Tetris! Microbiology from Dr. Mario! Animal husbandry from Pokémon!
To be fair, the program (which was recently examined in a Reuters write-up) requires students at Japan's Joshi Gakuen all-girl junior high school to use special English-instructing software with the handhelds, which are collected at the end of each class to prevent any unsavory Pokédueling during recess. The program is just barely into its one-year trial period, though the school's vice principal is very optimistic -- if only he knew he was actually transforming his pupils into rot-brained, knife-wielding miscreants!