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November 4th, 2008, 21:29 Posted By: wraggster
Why 11, because I like to go one step beyond (and copy people).
Nintendo has a very clear pattern with it’s handhelds. It makes three (main) versions of each console before moving on to the next generation. The pattern goes: the first one is clunky with a few problems, the second one fixes those problem, looks nice, and runs well, the third is not well received as people either already have a version of the handheld they like, or are waiting for the next generation.
Game Boy: Clunky ; Game Boy Pocket: Good ; Game Boy Color: Unnecessary.
Game Boy Advance: Poorly lit Screen ; Game Boy Advance: SP: Good ; Game Boy Advance: Micro: Unnecessary.
Now we’re on the third iteration of the DS, starting with the Original DS (Phat) which is a great handheld, but big, and clunky. The DS Lite made it sleeker and lighter. Will the DSi break the tradition of the third iteration being unnecessary?
No.
Here’s your top 11 list of why the DSi is an unnecessary step for Nintendo, starting with….
Honorable Mention: Why does a top 11 list need an honorable mention? For now, this one is nothing more than a rumor, but if the rumor is true, it’s a huge mistake from Nintendo.
Incompatable software. Apparently some developers have been complaining the DSi doesn’t actually work with some original DS games. And I’m not talking about weird games that need the GBA slot or something, I’m talking about simple compatibility issues. Still, it’s possible that the devs just got an early, incomplete model, and there have been no reports of incompatible software from those who have gotten a DSi in Japan, so this may not be an issue.
11. Yet another Power Cord
Seriously guys, do you have to have a new plug and power cord for every single model of the DS? Keep in mind if you’re a Guitar Hero: On Tour fan, you’re going to have to port around the the DS Phat or DS Lite and your DSi, along with both power cords. Seriously Nintendo, keep it simple.
10. Microphone Morph is a stupid idea.
Oh look, you can record your voice with the microphone and play it back, while morphing it in real time. That will be fun for about… 15 seconds. After that, you’ll realize that this is nothing more than a crappy version of Talkboy, not a feature to be shown off.
When you can compare a gaming console feature to a Home Alone 2 prop, you know something has gone terribly wrong.
9. Camera Morph is a stupid idea.
Buahahaha, look at the silly face…… okay seriously, this is another feature that will last maybe 2 seconds before you just go straight to playing games. You may be able to morph photos and even morph them in real time, but seriously, this is just a distraction. Nintendo is putting a lot of effort to distract us from playing games on this console.
8. The camera quality is crap.
Why do I have two points for how stupid the cameras on the DSi are? Because it has TWO cameras, for twice the stupid. No matter what camera you take pictures from the quality is absolutely poor, and only gets worse when you transfer images to the PC. Oh, and by the way, you can’t transfer images from your PC back onto the DSi. So in case you thought you could use the DSi as your personal portable photo gallery, too bad.
Some have defended Nintendo for putting two cameras on there because: A. Every electronic device has a camera on it these days, B. Nintendo can make some unique games with the camera and put your head in there.
Well A. Since when does Nintendo need to do what every other company does. They’ve always tried to shown innovation, and frankly, if every device has a camera, then I guess the DSi doesn’t need one. Nintendo has always pushed the line that they make gaming consoles, not multi-media devices (at least that’s their defense for no DVD player in the Wii), so why have they suddenly switched over?
For Part B, Nintendo won’t be able to make many unique games because Sony has already done this with the Eye Toy. The most Nintendo can do is put your face on a Mii, and maybe detect if you’re there. It certainly will never reach the quality or precision of the Eye Toy, so why try?
7. Slow, clunky internet, and a slow store.
When Nintendo revealed the DSi, it was first thought they were going to try to somewhat compete with the iPhone. Frankly, the speeds on their Opera Browser definitively prove they aren’t even trying. Even if you surf their DSi Shop, it will take you 30 seconds to get in, with 5-10 second waits between every tap. Surfing the web becomes even more of a chore, with each page taking a minute or so to load. You can’t even scroll at any reasonable speed without the DSi being forced to try to load and catch up. I certainly hope no one was planning to use the DSi to check their mail, because the crappy browser can’t handle sites like GMail or Hotmail. Even something like viewing videos on the go is out of the question because it can’t handle sites like YouTube. All of this firmly leaves the DSi browser as a big fat WHY. Why even bother to include an internet browser if it can’t even function on a basic level.
6. Nintendo Points, Wii Points, and DS Points
As it stands, Wii Points are annoying enough. if you can’t get your credit card to work in the store (I never have), you have to go out, buy points $20 at a time, spend them on the games you want, but you’ll never get all of your money back, there will always be a few 100 points left a side because you can’t spend them all. Well now with DSi Ware, the points have changed to Nintendo Points. For a moment, fans of downloadable games cheered, foolishly thinking Nintendo would unite DS points and Wii points, allowing you to spend your money anywhere.
But no, instead, you buy Nintendo Points, and then redeem them as Wii points or DS points. Once they are separated, the can never be combined. if you want to buy some DSi Ware, but all of your points are on your Wii, too bad. Once again Nintendo can’t provide a simple and straight forward way to BUY THEIR GAMES. Oh yeah, and make sure you don’t lose your DSi, otherwise you’ll lose all your points and the games you downloaded. Wouldn’t that be a shame.
5. The options for DSi Ware are weak.
What launched with WiiWare? Dr. Mario Online Rx. It was a brilliant game to launch with, reviving classic gameplay with online modes and letting users send demos to friends, to get them to buy in too.
So what exciting games are launching on DSi Ware!?
Umm… Art House games?
Train Schedules?
Oh look, Wario Ware! That’s exciting…. except, this isn’t a new Wario Ware game. They just took the old microgames and let you play them for infinity. Oh boy, kinda like you can ALREADY DO if you unlock them in the game. Seriously, this goes beyond the standard Nintendo policy of rereleasing games and charging you for them all over again. This is only releasing part of a game to make a little money off of you at a time.
The biggest selling point for the DSi Ware has been the Wario Ware game where you can make custom games. However, Nintendo has been vague on the details. They say you can share the games with your friends, but can you share them over WiFi? If not, it’s a huge disappointment in my book, a potential bombshell that just fizzled out. It’s not like any of this matters since:
4. DSi ware is region locked
Nintendo explains to Eurogamer that software developed specifically for the freshly-announced DSi will be region-locked, meaning the handheld will only be compatible with DSi software released for its intended territory. This confirms that DSWare downloaded from the DSi Shop will only work for compatible DSi hardware, which is really no suprise given that online games are often localized for different countries
So for any of you planning to import this little baby now because it can play English DS games, stop right now. If you import the DSi, you will never be able to play anything or do anything involving DSi Ware and the DSi Shop (unless you’re willing to fly over to Japan to download it). This wouldn’t be as infuriating if Nintendo hadn’t already announced that they wouldn’t release the DSi in America till Fall of 2009 because of the strong sales of the DS Lite. So any of those who were excited may as well calm down. You’ll either import early and screw yourself out of DSi Ware, or have to sit on your hands for almost a year before you get it.
3. The death of the GBA slot.
Alas, GBA slot, I knew thee well. When the DS first released, though were the only reason the system stayed alive. You nurtured the DS sales along, until the DS Library could get upon it’s feet and walk for itself. Nay, not only did thou make the DS all the more suitable as the ultimate handheld, allowing gamers to bring a long a classic GBA game along with a DS game, but thou were also necessary for on of the latest games, the Guitar Hero: On Tour series with Guitar Grip.
Okay, enough of that. Some may defend the loss of the GBA slot as a necessary evolution as the DS becomes it’s own console, but I simply disagree. I feel as though gamers have been forced to trade a valuable slot that brought a whole lot of variety for the DS just for a camera. Some might say that it had to go to put all the new technology in there, but that’s a lie. In fact, the only reason the GBA slot was dropped was in order to make the DSi smaller. Not worth it if you asked me.
So those of you who bought Guitar Hero: On Tour, stick with the DS Lite.
Those Pokemon players who want to transfer Pokemon from the GBA games to the DS games, stick with the DS Lite.
Those who will get the Motion Pack for Tony Hawk Motion better stick with the DS Lite.
And numerous games that used the rumble pack will have to say goodbye as well.
Was it really worth losing all of this for size?
2. DSi to stop Flash Cards, Homebrew
The homebrewers who have gotten their hands on the DSi have found that none of the techniques they have in their arsenal can get past the DSi’s defenses against homebrewing. What may be a victory for Nintendo will probably also cause a drop in sales. Let’s face it, if you make a portable device, it will get hacked. The catch is, the homebrew community usually ends up creating a strange extra market, that gives people even more incentive to buy the console in the first place. When will Nintendo realize that these homebrewers are actually helping to push their product, and even if they magically stopped them, they would just download and play the games some other way.
So does Nintendo think they somehow magically stopped the homebrewers now? They shouldn’t. There are two ways this can go:
1. The homebrewers once again figure a way to hack into the DS, but this t ime they have the advantage of having SD cards to work from.
2. The homebrewers simply DON’T BUY A DSi!
Seriously Nintendo, all you have done is pissed off the core gamer again, and reduced the appeal of the next DS (which with this growing list, wasn’t hard). Nintendo needs to realize that as long as they refuse to acknowledge the homebrew crowd, they’ll always find a way to worm into their consoles.
And the number one reason why the DSi is a miscalculation by Nintendo is….
1. Nintendo took one giant HALF step
Nintendo saw the success of the DS Lite, but had a problem. On one side, the Apple iPhone was cutting into their tech geek dollars and even competing with them in touch based games. On the other side, the DS was reach a saturation point where even with their new, expanded crows, everyone who was going to buy a DS had already bought one.
Nintendo attempted to appeal to both sides, and failed miserably with the DSi.
One the first hand of the equation, the “new” features of the DSi feel awfully old. Adding two cameras may add some gameplay opportunities, but it’s just a gimmick, one quickly recognized by the average gamer. Beyond that, with every tech device under the sun already having a camera, it seems almost quaint that Nintendo would add one. As I said before, Nintendo was supposed to be the company focused soley on gaming, so this reach felt fake, against their original appeal. On the other side of the equation, nothing on the DSi is appealing enough to make casual gamers who already own a DS go out and get one. Yes, they’ll miss out on the DSi Ware, but frankly, it’s not missing much.
Despite the fact that system has already launched in Japan, Nintendo has left some questions about DSi Ware unanswered. For instance, the biggest question I have, will these games survive to the next handheld? We don’t really know. Based on Nintendo’s previous patterns, the next handheld is just two years away, maybe less. Will that next one have a touch screen and a microphone and two screens and two cameras as well? If it doesn’t, then I suppose your DSi Ware games just won’t be able to move over. Will Nintendo even support moving the games over? Are any other games coming down the pipe? The announcement and release of the DSi came so fast, I’ve heard little of any other developer looking to support DSi Ware. Obviously part of the hesitation is that the DSi isn’t in the U.S. yet and won’t be for 9 months. So will there be good DSi ready by that time? Can we transfer the DSi Ware games to the Wii to play on the big screen?
My apologies if this last point has degraded into nothing more than a rant, but it seriously feels that Nintendo has blind sided us, trying to promise a new console (once again calling it a third pillar, as they once called the DS before it killed the GBA) that barely improves on the old. It feels as though Nintendo is afraid to make the next leap into a new generation of handhelds, and the results could be disastorus.
Perhaps some of my questions will be answered by the time the DSi comes to Amercia (we certainly have the time to wait and see). Until then, don’t get excited, certainly don’t import it. Nintendo has a lot still to prove with the DSi.
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